Archive for the 'Heritage Peniel' Category

Oct 15 2016

Light

Light at the end of the tunnel. It’s an interesting phrase, cliche, concept, and reality. I remember spending months and years wondering why every light I would see would end up being a train to pummel me rather than the end of the tunnel. Just when I would glimpse hope or joy, my life would […]

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Oct 04 2016

Blinding

October has always been one of my favorite months. In fact, if I had been a more patient woman, I would have waited an extra five months to get married just so I could have an October anniversary! But as it happened, seven days post college graduation was all I was willing to wait. (No […]

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Jun 29 2016

Lenses

It never ceases to amaze me how our experiences shape and color the lenses through which we look. Even something as simple as a devotional title this morning… it struck me… My eyes read “Riding the Rollercoaster of Miscarriage.” I was surprised to find, upon reading it & then going back to the top to […]

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Oct 15 2015

Balloon Release, PAIL Day 2015

I can’t remember for sure if we have done this every year or not, but if it hasn’t been an annual tradition, it’s been really doggone close. I remember doing it with Gabriel at our old house when he was only a year or two old, and how the balloons got caught in our neighbors’ […]

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Oct 15 2015

Nine Treasures, on PAIL Day

Today (Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day) we are remembering our darlings in heaven, the nine siblings of our treasures here. While this day does not cut so acutely into my heart as it once did, it is still a day that bittersweetly blesses and affects me. In addition to treasures of glory, of Christ, […]

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Jan 31 2015

Remembering my Heritage

365 days later, I am somehow still shocked that the rainbow has been obscured so profoundly by the storm again. I keep praying for the shadows to fade, for the sunlight to peek through the clouds, for an undeniable rainbow to burst forth. But not yet. Will it ever? I don’t know… Heritage, my sweet […]

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Oct 20 2014

Tangibly Remembering

Psalm 105:1-6 Oh give thanks to the Lord; call upon His name; make known His deeds among the peoples! Sing to Him, sing praises to Him; tell of all His wondrous works! Glory in His holy name; let the hearts of those who seek the Lord rejoice! Seek the Lord and His strength; seek His […]

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Oct 15 2014

Unedited Raw Remembrance

I remember Covenant Hope. She made me “Mommy”—she was the first little image-bearer of my husband and me that God used us to create. I remember peeing in a little glass cup that had a sheep on it. I remember seeing a plus sign in the test window, but it was faint and I did […]

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Oct 04 2014

Little Darlings

If you’ve been marked by what might have been you don’t forget. You know the day, the years. You know when the baby would have been born… It makes the calendar feel like a minefield, like you’re constantly tiptoeing over explosions of grief until one day you hit one, shattered by what might have been. […]

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Jul 26 2014

My Wounds

I may have written this post a good while ago (not long after Heritage died), but it feels just as fresh, and my wounds are picked open and oozing even now. But the point is this: the wounds are not for naught. These wounds will be redeemed. There is a reason that I can not […]

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