Be It So

This following excerpt from “Streams In The Desert” was a great encouragement to me; this devotional book constantly blesses, encourages, and challenges me as I struggle from day to day.

When talking with a dear friend yesterday, she asked how she could pray specifically for me as I endure the medical treatments that are so hard for me. I told her that I need courage. Courage to endure them and be thankful for them; and also courage to pray for that courage! I find myself still praying for God to take this cup from me. But I am realizing (in my stubbornness) that I need to stop praying for that. The cup isn’t going away. He isn’t taking it anywhere. I need to start praying for courage to drink it. The poem here at the bottom of this excerpt reminds me of that: “we can do more than this, O Soul.” And so in my plight, this encouraged me & challenged me. Perhaps in your plight, whatever that is, it will do the same for you.

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“As sorrowful, yet always rejoicing” (2 Corinthians 6:10).

The stoic scorns to shed a tear; the Christian is not forbidden to weep. The soul may be dumb with excessive grief, as the shearer’s scissors pass over the quivering flesh; or, when the heart is on the point of breaking beneath the meeting surges of trial, the sufferer may seek relief by crying out with a loud voice. But there is something even better.

They say that springs of sweet fresh water well up amid the brine of salt seas; that the fairest Alpine flowers bloom in the wildest and most rugged mountain passes; that the noblest psalms were the outcome of the profoundest agony of soul.

Be it so. And thus amid manifold trials, souls which love God will find reasons for bounding, leaping joy. Though deep call to deep, yet the Lord’s song will be heard in silver cadence through the night. And it is possible in the darkest hour that ever swept a human life to bless the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. Have you learned this lesson yet? Not simply to endure God’s will, nor only to choose it; but to rejoice in it with joy unspeakable and full of glory.
–from TABF

I will be still, my bruised heart faintly murmured,
As o’er me rolled a crushing load of woe;
The cry, the call, e’en the low moan was stifled;
I pressed my lips; I barred the tear drop’s flow.

I will be still, although I cannot see it,
The love that bares a soul and fans pain’s fire;
That takes away the last sweet drop of solace,
Breaks the lone harp string, hides Thy precious lyre.

But God is love, so I will bide me, bide me–
We’ll doubt not, Soul, we will be very still;
We’ll wait till after while, when He shall lift us
Yes, after while, when it shall be His will.

And I did listen to my heart’s brave promise;
And I did quiver, struggling to be still;
And I did lift my tearless eyes to Heaven,
Repeating ever, “Yea, Christ, have Thy will.”

But soon my heart upspake from ‘neath our burden,
Reproved my tight-drawn lips, my visage sad:
“We can do more than this, O Soul,” it whispered.
“We can be more than still, we can be glad!”

And now my heart and I are sweetly singing–
Singing without the sound of tuneful strings;
Drinking abundant waters in the desert,
Crushed, and yet soaring as on eagle’s wings.
–S. P. W.

Grilled Pizza

My husband and I have enjoyed many styles of pizza from many places, including Italy and Chicago with their famous deliciousness. 🙂 But I realized recently that I had never made grilled pizza for him! Gasp. So I fixed that.

Grilling the pizzas was so fun! Love it. (and it brought back memories of doing this with Family Fellowship – anyone remember that?) 🙂

We topped them with fresh mozzarella, tomatoes and basil from my garden, garlic oil, kalamata olives, turkey pepperoni, and feta. That is how you spell delicious.

Monet Sunflowers

How have I not yet mentioned that my garden is edged now with gorgeous, sunny heads?!

These beautiful sunflowers are Monets, courtesy of my friends Jaclynn & Samantha. And now I want to learn how to successfully keep seeds — anyone want to give me some tips? 🙂

Vintage Tablecloth-Skirt

Back in June, my mother took me to an antique fair and craft show, and we each came home with some vintage tablecloths. Two of mine I have used for pretty tablecloths, one for a pretty picnic blanket, and one has been sitting waiting for me to turn it into a skirt! While at the event a couple months ago, I saw some really fun skirts with handkerchief hemlines that were tagged at $52 apiece (and the tablecloths were only $10-15 apiece), and really wanted one! So I dedicated one cloth to the idea, and yesterday I finally did it.

My sweet and capable mother did all the figuring-out-of-things, and I just followed along. 🙂 It really was quite simple! And, like I said, my mother is very capable at figuring things out. She even had a small zipper and bias tape in her stash of craft goodies, so it involved nothing more than supplies we already had and time we could spare anyway.

What we started with:

Sewing:

Ironing:

Modeling:

Art Time

Gabriel loves when I bring out The Art Bucket to do “art time” together. Fingerpainting and coloring are our current favorites.

Prayers and Results

We got some blood test results earlier than we expected, and it looks like my various medical treatments are doing what they should in my body. The results are not overly astounding but they are adequate. So we are thankful for this confirmation from our wise Father in Heaven that we are doing the right things. He is kind! So onward and forward we go. I am praying continually for grace upon grace each day as I swallow all my pills, poke my belly with injections, schedule iv treatments, and even make plans for another plane trip for one more of those treatments down south next month. Praying that I would recognize these treatments as gifts from God, as privileges, as beautiful sacrifices that I am called to make for my family as well as my King & His kingdom.

Thanks for the prayers I know you offer on our behalf.
May the Lord encourage your spirits, even as you encourage mine.

Our Liturgical Boy

Our Gabriel David loves liturgy. He is most definitely our boy!

Last evening he suddenly burst into song (as he is often wont to do), singing what sounded like, HO-ee HO-ee HO-ee oh ah ah oh
And then of course he concluded with his very predictable, Meh, which means Amen.

Steven and I looked at each other across the room, both thinking the same thing. “That just sounded like holy holy holy!”
I couldn’t imagine why he would know the song Holy, Holy, Holy since I don’t sing it to him that often.
But Steven said, “I think that was the Sanctus!”

So we asked Gabriel to sing it again. And he did the same exact thing again.

Then he pointed to Steven and said, “Daddy,” indicating that it was Daddy’s turn to sing it.
So Steven did.
He sang the Sanctus from the Dorian Service by Tallis.
And Gabriel was intensely delighted!
He couldn’t have been more thrilled that we knew what he was singing!

It was totally the Sanctus that Gabriel was singing.
Makes sense, really, considering we sing it after confession and absolution every week at worship, in addition to most nights throughout the week.

I think we ended up singing the Sanctus about a dozen times last evening (in family worship as well as just randomly) because we were all just so thrilled!
After we put Gabriel to bed, we could still hear him through the monitor singing HO-ee Ho-ee Ho-ee to his animals in his crib. It was so precious, I almost cried.
If I could figure out how to post videos, I would let you take a listen yourself. He only sings the first line recognizably (unless you’re his parent), but he conducts the entire thing while we sing it (have I mentioned his fanatic love of conducting?), breathes in all the right places, copies our mouth shape & vowel sounds, and tries his best to belt out the ending Hosannas.

We already knew he was a fantastic little boy, with his big faith in God and love of liturgy.
But last night just lit us up.
God is mighty at work.
God is, indeed, Gabriel’s strength.
And I am excited to see what God continues to do with this child of His: my son, my brother ~ Gabriel.

Seeking my God today with trepidation. Asking Him to oversee every drop of blood that was pulled from our veins this morning and now wings its way to various labs across the country. Begging Him to show His mercy to us, for the sake of His children and because of His own steadfast love!

Psalm 44:17-26

All this has come upon us,
though we have not forgotten You,
and we have not been false to Your covenant.
Our heart has not turned back,
nor have our steps departed from Your way
;
yet You have broken us in the place of jackals
and covered us with the shadow of death.

If we had forgotten the name of our God
or spread out our hands to a foreign god,
would not God discover this?
For He knows the secrets of the heart.
Yet for Your sake we are killed all the day long;
we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered.

Awake! Why are You sleeping, O Lord?
Rouse yourself! Do not reject us forever!

Why do You hide your face?
Why do You forget our affliction and oppression?
For our soul is bowed down to the dust;
our belly clings to the ground.
Rise up; come to our help!
Redeem us for the sake of Your steadfast love!

A Grander Heroism

Must life be a failure for one compelled to stand still in enforced inaction and see the great throbbing tides of life go by? No; victory is then to be gotten by standing still, by quiet waiting. It is a thousand times harder to do this than it was in the active days to rush on in the columns of stirring life. It requires a grander heroism to stand and wait and not lose heart and not lose hope, to submit to the will of God, to give up work and honors to others, to be quiet, confident and rejoicing, while the happy, busy multitude go on and away. It is the grandest life “having done all, to stand.”

~J.R. Miller~

Inject

For the first time, today I gave myself a blood thinner injection. It took a bit more guts than I anticipated (I didn’t know I would be a weenie about it!), and I sat there staring at my skin and its proximity to the needle longer than I had expected — but I did it. 🙂 Thanks, sweet husby, for being with me and cheering me on while I stabbed myself in the stomach and winced and read the directions aloud meanwhile. lol.

Thankfully the bruise is much smaller than I anticipated, and as long as I plunged the injection slowly it hurt less than I expected. So those are nice things. That’s my way of looking on the bright side today. 😉